Penny's Story

A cute little drummer living her dream.

Even being the ex-wife of a transsexual garners hate sometimes

A while ago, when I got fed-up of guys emailing me after seeing my pics online, only to have the guys disappear and/or say hateful things when I told them that I’m a transsexual, I started posting the email or IM transcripts just to show how much people can suck sometimes. Well, amazingly enough, even my ex-wife gets hate for having been married to a transsexual. What the heck? This little exchange happened between my ex and a wicked winner the other day. I asked her if it was okay if I shared it, because I just couldn’t believe it and I wanted to rant about it. Anyway, here it is (in case it’s not obvious, “J” is my ex):

m: i wanna eat u
J: Bye!!!
m: will u let me
m: y u say bye?
J: Not so interested anymore.
J: Sorry.
m: why arent u
J: I believe strongly in a healthy sexual relationship…but that’s not all there is. You don’t even know me and that’s all you can think about. You show little interest in getting to know me…but TONS of interest in sex.
m: lol
J: What is so funny?
m: you!!
J: And why is that?
J: Enlighten me…
m: maybe u got what u wanted by ur ex
J: Glad that I can finally see the real you. Have a nice life…
m: oh i will darling i will
m: see i see the you in u how u r
m: well i do hope u get a disease and die,,, for marrying a fag
m: why would a man change himeself to be a lady like,,, that tells me ur not worth it
 

So, wow do I have a lot to say about this. It’s pretty obvious this guy realized that he wasn’t gonna get his willy wet and decided to lash out. I’m surprised by the amount of vitriol that this guy would unleash on someone that he had chatted with several times; I know the internet encourages people to be more rude than they ever would be in person, but still. “I do hope you get a disease and die.” WTF? Also, this kind of reminds me of the reaction that some tranny-chasers have when they get shot down; when a transwoman turns down the advances of a chaser, the chaser will often respond by calling the transwoman a “fag.” Damn, people are messed and conflicted.

Most importantly is the assertion that he makes in his last line. I know that J has worried that she had something to do with me transitioning. But she had nothing to do with me going into the dress-up box in Nursery School and picking out the high heels; she had nothing to do with me stealing my mom’s pantyhose when I was twelve; she had nothing to do with me buying a dress for one of my girlfriends wishing that I could wear it instead of her. J had nothing to do with the fact that I’m transgendered; it started way before her. The reason this pisses me off so much is that J saved me; she encouraged me to join my first support group, start therapy, and accept myself for who I truly am. I can’t believe that someone would give her any shit whatsoever about that. J is one of the most amazing people I’ve ever met, and it pisses me off when people don’t treat her right. It’s weird how I feel protective of her; I’ve told her that in some ways I feel like her big sister, in some ways I feel like her little sister, I am her ex-husband [there’s a mind-fuck if ever there was one], and we’re best friends. This is just about the strangest (and most lovely) relationship I’ve ever had with anyone.

There was one nice thing about this exchange, I can totally picture J saying, “Enlighten Me.” She has such a “hey, fuck you” tone when she wants to. I only wish this guy could have heard her say it, I’m sure it was cutting as hell.

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1 Comment»

  ChrissyOne wrote @

Dear ‘m’,

Die in a fire.

Call ChrissyOne if you have anything else to fucking say.

-c


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